Values direct our lives. They feature as what we want our lives to be about. Our lives derive meaning, vitality, power, inspiration, and motivation from our values. Also, values stimulate us to break out of life-restricting patterns caused by anxiety and shame or the torpor of withdrawal that fuel depression. Further with, how to act on our core values, begins with clarifying them. Forward from, putting our core values into action, gives meaning and direction to our lives. To get clear about our core values and make a commitment to act according to them, get us moving beyond short-term unhelpful coping strategies. These strategies often show as using drugs or alcohol to suppress emotions or avoiding an upcoming social event due to anxiety. These bring relief in the short-term but harm us in the long run.
Here Is How To Act On Our Core Values
1. Identify Your Core Values
Values are directions, while goals are specific destinations or way points as we move in the direction of a given value. Values are processes, basic, intrinsic, abstract principles like love, truth, trust, creativity. Needs, desires or preferences such as food, sex, or romance books, do not feature as values. Values define what we care about in the various areas or domains of our lives.
Spirituality:
work as a calling, integrity, honesty, humility. Here, we exemplify these values to have a relationship with God, Universe or Something larger than ourselves.
Intimate Relationship:
love, openness, and fidelity. This area is about typifying the values in our relationship with our significant others.
Family Of Origin:
love, respect, and acceptance. Uplift your relationship with your father, mother, and siblings, by demonstrating these values.
Friends and Social Life:
loyalty, trust, love. We exhibit these values to nurture our friendships.
Physical Self-care And Health:
strength, vitality, and health. We mirror these values through proper diet, exercise, and preventive measures.
Parenting:
protecting, teaching, love. These values help us to honour motherhood and fatherhood.
Education and Learning:
truth, wisdom, skill. Whether we are in school or not, these values motivate us to continue learning.
Community Life And Citizenship:
justice, responsibility, and charity. Motivated by these values, we serve our community through charitable work or political action of some kind.
Recreation And Leisure:
fun, creativity, passion. In this domain, the values stimulate us to recharge our batteries and reconnect with family and friends through fun games.
Work And Career:
right livelihood, excellence, and stewardship. These values embody what we would like to accomplish at work, and what we would like to stand for in our workplace.
2. Create A Log To Work On Your Most Important Two Or Three Domains
In the first column, write your most important domains; second column, your intentions. Your intentions are the things that you’d be doing if you could get past all the painful thoughts and feelings that keep you from acting 100 percent on your values. Describe small, discrete, measurable actions, not vague general intentions like “be more loving” or stay calm.” In contrast, measurable actions define what you will do exactly, in words and actions. Whom you will do this with. Where and in what situation you will do it. When you will do it. Clearly, highlighting specific value-based actions forms the core of how to act on our values
3. Identify The Thoughts And Feelings That Stop You From Acting On Your Intentions
To accomplish this, visualise yourself doing each of your intentions. Close your eyes and truly imagine with all your senses, what it would be like. See yourself and any other people. Observe what you do. Familiarise yourself with the sounds, smells, temperature, and texture. Imagine the thoughts running through your mind and the sensations in your body. Focus on the thoughts and feelings that will be barriers to acting on your intentions. Record them in the barriers column of your log.
4 Plan And Take Committed Actions
Oftentimes, when we turn in the direction of our values, painful emotions and thoughts rear up. Committed actions requires us cultivating the willingness to feel some painful emotions, in service of our values. Our values are our motivation. Focusing on them takes our attention off painful feelings.
What is more, start with your strongest most important values, as these are your most powerful motivators. Next, do some careful planning. Think about concrete goals, specific actions to perform, in a series of small, manageable steps, at certain times, in certain places, and with particular people.
Putting a construction on, here unfolds a committed action plan. In service of my value of caring and compassion for my family, I’m willing to feel nervous and anxious. This will enable me to drive on the freeway with heavy truck traffic, to visit dad in the hospital. These are the steps I’ll follow. On Tuesday 6p.m, I’ll call dad and tell him I’ll visit on Thursday evening. Wednesday after work, I’ll fuel up the car, check my brake pads, clean windows, and mark map. Thursday 5p.m, drive to the hospital and have a wonderful time visiting.
Conclusion
In a matter of hours, we can identify our values, and commit to valued actions. Using a ten-week log helps us to track our follow-through, and reassess our values. As we entrench the habit of following through on valued intentions, we start allowing emotions to flow through us, instead of obstructing us. Asking ourselves, “what’s really important to me in this situation? What do my values direct me to do here, and committing to them, helps us to move beyond feelings of shame, and guilt, anger, and depression.
