How To Start Intimacy: 19 Sure Ways.

How to start intimacy stars as a topic supportive of our emotional well-being. Opening yourself to intimacy makes you feel loved and loving. As well, it energises and calms you. When you operate from steadfastness and open yourself to intimacy, more of it flows into your life. Intimacy is a feeling while love is characterized by genuine actions.

That feeling of connectedness and closeness that bonds, for a moment in time, one human being to another, to a group, to nature, to the universe, defines intimacy. Thus, intimacy not only happens over candlelight dinners or on sandy beaches in the Caribbean, but it is also likely to happen in a shopping mall, in the lunch room at work or among strangers cheering wildly at a sports arena. One can feel intimate with another without the other having any knowledge of the feelings. On a different note, intimacy can happen simultaneously between two people. Also, you can feel intimate with a crowd of strangers jumping up and down and cheering because your favourite team secured a victory. Likewise, a feeling of closeness and connectedness with the universe often overwhelms one watching the sunset or standing by a roaring stream. Hence, how to start intimacy is a topic relevant in most situations of our life.

Starting intimacy means taking the following steps.

1. Be Attentive To The People Around You

Adopting the attitude of living in the moment enables the husband to feel that connectedness and closeness with the wife singing his favourite song in the shower. In like manner, it helps the wife to feel intimate with the husband as she observes his unusual stubbles or crumpled hair.

2. Celebrate Others’ Successes And Accomplishments

The simple gesture of nodding and smiling at a friend to acknowledge a successful strike at fishing, often becomes an avenue to intimacy.

3. Engage In Simple Acts Of Kindness

Wiping a stain off a colleague’s, friend’s or spouse’s coat sleeve or helping to carry some of the personal belongings creates the right atmosphere for intimacy. Like so, thoughtfulness ranks well in the discipline of how to start intimacy.

How To Start Intimacy

4. Don’t Be Quick To Judge Or Criticise; Appreciate First

A husband raising his head from a newspaper and appreciating with a smile the wife who just walked into the kitchen, often secures a moment of closeness with her. That rewarding moment would have been lost if he responded with something like “What are you doing up so early?

5. Take a Moment To Think Before Rejecting That Sentimental Request From A Partner

Reconsidering and saying “yes” after you have said “no” to the request will not help you to recover the lost opportunity to feel close to your partner. So, take a second to think before rejecting that offer to eat out on the porch

6. Steer Your Mind Away From Negative Thoughts That Lead To Anger

Intimacy will not happen if you are angry or critical with someone. Thus, how to start intimacy is a subject that recognises the truth that you cannot hate and feel close at the same time.

7. Refrain From Being Too Busy, For It Keeps You Away From Feeling Intimate

Taking the time to listen to your inner feelings, observe what is going on around you, and interact with others, opens you to intimacy.

8. Be Sensitive To The Preferences And Desires Of Those Around You

You cannot make intimacy happen, but you can set the stage for it. Being mindful of the needs of the people around you, in words and deeds, helps you to do that.

9. Get Your Family To Watch A Funny Movie With You

The opportunity for family members to feel that special closeness will arise each time you all laugh and look at each other.

10. Listen Respectfully And Quietly When Someone Talks

11. Thumb Through An Old Family Album

12. Take A Walk With A Friend Or Spouse

13. Tell A Joke To Someone

14. Bring To Everyone At The Office Or Home A Candy Bar

15. Confide To A Partner Or Friend A Dream For The Future

16. Look up And Smile Broadly When Someone Enters The Room

17. Invite Friends Over For Dinner

18. Be Attentive To Your Pet As It Greets You

19. Offer Someone A Compliment, Present Or Hug

Intimacy is free, available and plentiful. Its energising feelings motivate us to extend genuine acts of love and care that increases our life satisfaction.


  • Great post! I think sometimes we forget the small things we can do for/with each other to show our partners intimacy and/or closeness on a daily basis. This was a great reminder of the things that we sometimes take for granted and don’t realize. I loved this post!

  • These are some great ideas, many of which I practice, that will lead to greater intimacy with others.

  • These are really important life tips on how to be a decent human being… then again, it takes such decency to build lasting friendships and intimacy with others.

  • Alot of this seems tied to living in the moment and really appreciating the people and family around you. That is such a healthy and good way to live. This post is a great reminder to stop and take a breather to be with the people we love.

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